I used to have a 50 /50 love / hate relationship with vacations. When say vacations, I’m talking about everything from a weeklong trip to a destination, a long weekend off from work, and even major holidays such as Christmas. Now it is a 99 /1 love relationship. It isn’t that my vacations have changed that much. It’s that I have changed. Not just more grey hair on my head, but what has happened in my head. My brain has changed, and thus so has my mind. (Note: There is an embedded sophism in that last sentence) Now I love vacations and Christmas. Not the after part, but the during part and even the before part.
I hope you have a more-love-than-hate relationship with those vacations and time off. Americans, as a rule, do not take advantage of much of the vacation time they have earned. I’m guilty of it. Somehow, I think that my job is so important that I can’t step away or everything will fall apart. Even as a psychologist with a penchant for self-diagnosis, I don’t know what it says about me. But it is weird and I don’t like it.
Well, I didn’t like it. I have long since stopped subscribing to that. In fact, and this 100% true, I am typing this sentence on a Southwest flight heading towards a vacation spot with my wife. My right elbow is glued to my side lest it get constantly bumped by all of the aisle traffic. We all need to charge our batteries. Fully charged. Not just enough so we can function, fully charged. Easy to type, hard to do.
Let’s use the metaphor that your work life, the hustle and bustle is your conscious mind. Turned on, attempting to multitask (see earlier posts/episodes for why we can’t multi-think), and generally running wide open. Now, let’s suggest that the unconscious is the you that is on vacation. Sitting on a beach, or balcony, or even in a restaurant where you do not have to cook and clean. That is your unconscious. I am suggesting we should be on vacation every chance we get just as I suggest we should play with our unconscious every chance we get.
I know easy for me to type. First, there is the expense of traveling. Second, there is the very real consideration, that though we have saved vacation or sick days, our bosses and work culture don’t actually expect us to use them. In fact, it is frowned upon. Taking a sick day somehow means you are not 100% committed. I suggest that many of us have bought or currently still buy into that, because how often have you found a reason not to sit down for 15 minutes three times a week and play with a sophism? No judgment here. I struggle to do the same thing.
There is a way to harness the power of vacations and holidays even when you are at home or in the office and overwhelmed with too many mundane tasks. Not every day can be Christmas or a day at the beach, but there doesn’t have to be such a binary divide. By that, I mean 0 equals no vacation and 1 equals vacation. Maybe there is a ½. See blog post 17 “How many numbers are there?”
If you love Christmas, or if you look forward to a vacation, that time before the event is magical. I am a Christmas nut. I am writing this on February 11, on a plane to vacation and as I left this morning, my garage is still decorated with Christmas decorations. As a researcher, it is hard to precisely identify what it is about Christmas time or the excitement of packing for vacation that is so…tingly? Ok, maybe tingly is too much, so let counterbalance that term with a bit of neurology.
You might have heard that of the over 100 brain chemicals that have been identified, dopamine is the one related to anticipation and reward. Neurochemically, we would use the word dopaminergic to describe the time of anticipation. We would also use that word to describe the time before sex(Mitrokostas, 2019) when we think there is a good chance it is going to happen.
I think many people might agree the time before Christmas is better than the time after. And, that’s weird because ‘after’ is when you have the presents that you wished for. And, there is a noticeable drop in dopamine levels after orgasm. So, in a weird twist of the mind, wanting is better than having, and before is better than after.
This is true of the unconscious and good ideas. We who follow The Creativity Algorithm want to focus on the before. Just like you should be grateful for any Christmas gift you might receive, even if it is not the one you wanted, you should be happy if your unconscious brings you a good idea – even if it is not the one you wanted right then. If we focus on the process of getting good ideas, we will stay in the zone of playing with our unconscious in a relaxed state. If we switch to thinking of the ‘having’ and not of the proces, then we lose the very thing that will bring us the good idea. Am I asking you plan, look forward to a vacation, only to change your plans and postpone the vacation so you have more anticipation time? No, but would that be so bad? Then you would still have your vacation and more time to enjoy dreaming about it.
Don’t believe me that things are better before the vacation or before Christmas? Quickly think think of five Christmas songs. It shouldn’t be too hard. Are any of them about the time after Christmas? So, what does that have to do with my love / hate relationship with vacations and Christmas?
What makes a vacation great? As we discussed a big part of it is the anticipation. The beginning is very cool too. It is full of possibilities. Relaxation and Escapism. I don’t think anyone likes the end of the vacation, the journey home unpacking clothes, or packing up the decorations after the holiday.
What if, just what if, the thing that makes a vacation great is what you think about it. Vacations happen in the mind, not on the beach, mountains, or resorts. Many people love Christmas even though they don’t get presents or have decorations.
There are plenty of people who live and work at the beach, mountains, resorts, or other vacation spots and they are not on vacation. It isn’t just the fact that those people are working at those spots. It is not the work that prevents vacation mentality. You have had days off, when you didn’t go to work at home and it didn’t feel like vacation.
The magic of Christmas is in the mind, before the presents. The excitement of sex comes before the orgasm (yes I know what I did there) And, the magic of vacation is in the mind, not in the location. And, no one (as far as I know) consciously and meticulously assembles their Christmas, sexual, or their vacation fantasies. They just kind of appear in the conscious mind. And, I think you know from where.
Let’s discuss the interaction between the conscious mind and the unconscious mind, I’d like you to try to remember your phone number. Ok, now a family member’s number. Easy right? Embedded in that activity is the question from where did the phone number originate? That’s an interesting little sophism. As you read this sentence, where did that phone number go? That too is something for you to play with.
Now try to remember the time right before Christmas or before a vacation. Not so easy. Why? The short answer is that they are very different mental events with different qualities. How they are stored in the brain and where they are stored in the brain are very different from each other.
Remembering the before isn’t easy. But it is possible. When you just tried to remember your last vacation, maybe all that you got was just a glimpse. A flash. Then, it was gone. But, like I said in post/episode 1, the brain is very flexible. Imagine that learning something is like walking on a barely-there path in the woods. Difficult and slow. But the more you walk it the easier the path gets. If you can eventually learn to remember the goodness that existed before a vacation or holiday, why can’t that happen with the goodness that comes before a good idea? Remember, practice might not make perfect, but it does make progress.
For management professionals, don’t just allow time off because you have to allow it. What if, just what if you asked one of your team about their vacation before they go? Not the obligatory “How was your trip, now get started on everything that has piled up since you’ve been gone. Show them that you are interested in where they are going. Help them engage in the before.
The sophism for this week is to work with remembering the before – before something amazing that you anticipated and before your last good idea. Maybe it is just a flash. Maybe it is difficult, but so is making a trail in the wilderness that you have never been in before.
Take Away: Be purposeful in your attempt to find an alpha state. As much as I’ve talked about the before of Christmas and the before of vacation, those times are often very busy and require a lot of work. For this week, please take three mini vacations. Find a spot to sit or lie down. Work on your breathing. Work on relaxing your shoulders and facial muscles. Then find the before.
Spreading the Thoughts: Ask your friends and family what their best vacation memory is. Ask them if they liked the before. In fact, it might be fun to post that question on social media (with a mention of this blog of course!) The responses might include puzzlement.
Next Post: Bigger Batteries
For more information on how to help yourself and people in your organization learn how to have good ideas more regularly, please go to:
Website: joeswope-publicspeaker.com
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References
Mitrokostas, S. (2019, January 25). Here’s What Happens to Your Body And Brain When You Orgasm. ScienceAlert. Retrieved February 8, 2023, from https://www.sciencealert.com/here-s-what-happens-to-your-brain-when-you-orgasm
Shoreline Mileage of the U.S. (n.d.). NOAA Office for Coastal Management. Retrieved February 8, 2023, from https://coast.noaa.gov/data/docs/states/shorelines.pdf
Speer, M. E., & Delgado, M. R. (2017). Reminiscing about positive memories buffers acute stress responses. Nature Human Behaviour, 1(5), 93-100.
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